Less than 12 hours to go . . .

25 05 2008

. . . before my first testosterone injection. I feel a weird mix of calm and nervousness right now. I had a fantastic weekend out of town with one of the bestest people ever and met an inspirational performer who, like Lazlo Pearlman before him, rocked my little transboy world (more on that in a future post).

It would occur to me every now and then over the course of the weekend that this was the last one before this major change that I’m about to start tomorrow. It’s fitting that it should be an out-of-the-ordinary weekend, out of the country no less.

I wonder how I will feel tomorrow at this time. I guess I won’t know until then.

So, anyway . . . I guess this is kind of a boring “Last post before T” post, considering the irrevocable changes that are about to happen. I’m about to make a majorly massive life change here!!!  I don’t feel bored . . .just a little numb with so little to say and so much at the same time.

<Deep breathe>

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8 responses

26 05 2008
Edward

Just remember that it takes time too. You will most likely feel and see weekly changes for awhile but then it slows down. I had some good advice given to me when I first started T. I don’t know if it will app;y to you or help you in anyway but here it goes:
1) honor yourself and this very special time you have given yourself as you transition
2) Be willing to live inbetween gender, without a gender for a little while.
3) People are going to see what they want, gender you how they want
4) Enjoy the increased libido!
5) Don’t have too many expectations…just let it happen and just see what happens as it happens You might be surprised!

26 05 2008
genderoutlaw

Yippee, looking forward to your comments! What’s your starting dose?

After my first shot, I immediately noticed a very different taste in my mouth, but that hasn’t happened on any of my shots since. I also got a rush of energy after my first two shots, but haven’t really experienced that since. I’m looking forward to getting my dosage increased.

26 05 2008
queerunity

I don’t know much about when people start transitioning are there any side effects? I wish you the best of luck and success with your journey.

26 05 2008
Jacky V.

Thanks for the comments! I will post soon about how it went today . . . for now, suffice it to say that I’m relieved at how easy self-injection is! I feel great, but tired. Came back from a LONG road trip last night so . . . I really need some ZZZZZs.

26 05 2008
genderoutlaw

Well, there’s a difference between city and country medical care: where I live, there are no nurses, only doctors, and they give you your shots. For example, bio-men who are on T all go in for their shots. The doctors seemed surprised that I wanted to learn to self-inject, though this seems to be the norm for FTMs. I’m not in a rush, and for now I actually like going in and getting the regular check-up, but I’ll certainly want that freedom eventually.

queerunity, you might be interested in checking out some of the excellent information in Hudson’s Guide regarding testosterone therapy. As for side effects, I’m starting to get the acne!

26 05 2008
BT

I know I already said it but CONGRATULATIONS! Move forward into your new life, it’s going to be so exciting! And I hope the shots don’t make you feel too icky either!

–Sneakergirl

27 05 2008
Jacky V.

Genderoutlaw: how interesting that the norm there is for people to go in for their shots. I think you’re right that it reflects a less urban mentality. I think that, in general, a very urban way of life (fast-paced, etc) precludes a weekly or bi-weekly visit to a clinic, especially when the waiting time to see a nurse or doctor is so long. In any case, I’m glad that I can do it on my own. That was my biggest fear but the way the nurse showed me how to do it is very painless and easy. I’m looking forward to next Monday already!!

Sneak: thanks for the comment. Yes, I’m very excited about my new life. And I also hope NOT to feel icky : )

26 06 2008
1st Injection Day - May 26 « Tboy Jacky

[…] anticipation. I felt like I needed to be doing something. I tried blogging and, as one can see here, I wasn’t very successful at expressing myself. I tried to sleep but I was staring into […]

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